In a new interview with ThisdayLive, newly married Ibinabo Fiberisima said she’d prayer and cried to find a man of her husband. The mother of three, who has never been married, also spoke about her relationship with ex, Fred Amata.
What’s the secret behind your beauty?
Wow. I know am blossoming but that is what happens when you are in love. I have found my soul mate, my friend, my brother and that’s why I am glowing.
How did you feel when you noticed you are crazy about him?
Well, it’s not that I suddenly found that love. The love has been
there and we have been best of friends since our school days at
University of Ibadan and when we met again years after, we remained best
of friends. His kids and mine have always been wondering how both of us
can be this close, almost like a brother and a sister. I think the kids
planned it; they were like why don’t you two just get married and we
started thinking. After a while, we felt this is God telling us its time
and that’s it.
Can you share the experience of how he proposed to you?
(Laughs) He is an Igbo man oh! I think the kids planned it more
than we did. That’s how it is because the day he asked me, my kids were
calling. His kids too were calling and they were all abroad while we
were in Nigeria. So everybody was eager to know my reply. His kids were
like, ‘Daddy, have you asked her?’ My own kids too were also calling to
say, ‘Mummy, hope you said yes?’ (Laughs.) It was a beautiful moment and
everybody was happy.
What drives you crazy about him?
He looks after a woman very well. He adores me and he is a
family-oriented person. He loves his family. He loves us totally and he
is very committed to his work. He encourages me a lot in what I do and
we pray a lot. We have the fear of God which is paramount in our
relationship. I think we are heading in the right direction and of
course, with my kind of lifestyle and the kind of work I do, every man
will withdraw. But no, he is always there, giving me the strength,
support and ideas to improve on what I am doing. So, I really do admire
him.
You have tried to settle down several times in the past, why did the efforts fail?
I believe God wanted a better man for me that is why my past
relationships failed. Besides, my previous relationship did not work
because I was not patient enough. I tried my best to make it work. I
prayed severally and I wept. I even went the extra mile just to make it
work, but I never knew God had a better plan for me. I did all I could
to have a man I can call my own but God knows best and his reason are
unquestionable. Until I found my man, I have never enjoyed my
relationships. Marriage to me is supposed to be enjoyed not endured.
That is the major reason why I am settling down with someone that
understands me properly. My man is very romantic and caring. That is
what I asked from God and he gave it to me.
How is your relationship with Fred Amata, the father of your kid?
I can never ignore Fred. He is my daughter’s father and a wonderful
friend. I will never disrespect him. Even if I am with a man, I must
always walk up to him and greet him. Some people wouldn’t do that. I
have seen people who got separated and divorced and they don’t speak to
each other in public. I will never do that. Even if we had quarreled
before the event, I would still walk up to him and greet him. He is
still my true friend.
Is Fred Amata in support of your marriage?
Yes! Fred is aware of my marriage plans. He is not an enemy. Since
marriage did not work out for the two of us. He gave me is support. He
is very happy about it and I know he will continue to wish me well
because we are still good friends. Fred is my daughter’s father. Yes, he
knows about my marriage. He supports my marriage.
Will he attend your wedding?
Of course, yes! I have sent an invitation to him and I know he will
come. But one thing you must know is that whether he is coming or not,
the truth is Ibinabo is finally hooked for life.
So, what is your advice for those ladies that have given up on getting married?
They should place their hope in God. Remember, God’s time is the
best. No woman should feel the pressure to get married. Marriage should
not be by force or a do-or-die affair for any ladies –especially for
those considered being over-aged. If your marriage is not working, move
on because God has a better plan for you. If you are still searching
keep praying to God. One day, he will hear your cry. Marriage is a good
thing and good comes to those that believe it. Marriage should not be so
much about looking at each other but looking in the same direction
together. Always remember the positive things that brought you together
and then to concentrate on positive goals to achieve as a couple.
Marriage is not always 50/50. Some days you will wake up and may have to
give 90 per cent and your spouse will give 10 per cent. Other days you
may wake up and give 25 per cent and your husband will have to put in
the 75 per cent. If you want to keep your marriage long-lasting and
successful, be flexible in your attitudes. You should be willing to
create balance in your life, and be open to change. My observation is
that all the cute, unique things that made your spouse wonderful in the
beginning are going to be the things that get on your nerves later. Try
to focus on the positive. If you look for negative qualities in someone
you are sure to find them.
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